Category Archives: Quotations

Writing Blogs I Will Actually Read

This blog is where I make an occasional rant that readers should take for what it’s worth…which may not be much. For example, what follows is not one of my “spiritual” compositions…it’s just whining and complaining.

So, okay…I’ve been trying to catch up on my blog reading. Sometimes I start and then just decide I can’t spend the energy. So, If you want me to read what you write, here are some suggestions.

One, keep it short. I just don’t have time to read a chapter unless it is really, really compelling.

Two, use paragraphs for goodness sake! Every professional will tell you that paragraphs break up the reading into digestable bits. If you write everything into one block…I will most likely skip it.

Three, try to use decent grammar. If you are going to use incorrect grammar, make sure it is on purpose. As Carl Sandburg (who knew the rules of grammar quite well) said, “I never made a mistake in grammar but one in my life and as soon as I done it I seen it.” Poor, unintentional, grammar discredits you instantly.

For, Hay — use the rite word and learn to spel. I can’t stand it when peeple misspel stuf. I’ll bet you feel the same way to. I start reeding one of those and cant continue because of there terribel speling. And, don’t trust your spell-checker. Here’s why:

I have a spelling checker
It came with my PC
It plainly marks for my revue
Mistakes I cannot sea
I’ve run this poem threw it
I’m sure your please to no,
It’s letter perfect in it’s weigh
My checker tolled me sew
— anonymous

5, use hole words. I no u can do it. Y would u use letters when u cn use wrds? And skip the smiley faces, OK? Blogging is not texting.

Six, if you want me to read your stuff, tell me somewhere who you are. When I stumble on a new blog that seems interesting, I want to know something about who wrote it. Put an “about” button somewhere so I can see what you look like, where you live, what you do for a crust, and so forth. Since I write and read gardening blogs, it is especially important. Where do you garden? What’s the climate like? What’s your soil like?

Seven, don’t write until you have something to say. Don’t blog just because you have one. It was Benjamin Franklin who said, “If you would not be forgotten as soon as you are dead, either write things worth reading or do things worth writing.” Amen.

Okay, there you have it. I feel better already.

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Filed under Blogs & Blogging, Humor, Quotations, Writing

Mistakes? I’ve Made a Few

mistake2.jpg One of the chief advantages of writing in your sixties is that you’ve not already spouted a bunch of printed “pronouncements” you have to retract. You still eat crow…just not so much you choke on it. Most of my misstatements and missteps have gone unrecorded anywhere else but in my memory and that of innocent bystanders. At the same time I would say to my younger brothers and sisters, “Don’t be afraid to take risks and make mistakes.”

I’ve learned that one gains wisdom from the experiences of life, especially the mistakes. Continue reading

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Filed under Preaching/Teaching, Quotations, Religion

Anonymous

silouette.gif   From time to time I will be posting material from the most prolific author of all time, Anonymous. Many organizations have been named after him. I know Anonymous must be male because who would give their daughter such a name? People often give money and stuff trying to make it look like the gift came from him. How famous can you get?

There may be more than one person with that moniker.  You know, the person that writes angry/obscene letters using his name? Here’s a little poem in limerick style I wrote especially for this particular Anonymous:

Here’s to the writer, Anonymous,
With trouble his name is synonymous,
His address is unknown,
Never answers his phone,
He won’t say a word to the rest of us.

You might even say he’s quite villainous
The letters he writes somewhat boisterous
He just has one name,
So it’s hard to pin blame,
When Anonymous kicks up a ruckus.

Anonymous is very ubiquitous
Pompous, contentious, cantankerous
This is his description,
But with no fixed location,
His true essence seems quite amorphous.

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Filed under Poetry?, Quotations